Due to the location of my apartment, it was always more convenient for us both to stay there. The fact that he did not reciprocate with the passing on of his key to me wasn't something that I thought about right away. A good year into the relationship, I started to want to stay at his place. It was time for a change of scenery. We would often leave work at different times which would leave me waiting at the entrance to his apartment building. The first time this happened, not a big deal. The second time.....i'm annoyed. The third time, I was starting to see in the injustice in me not having a copy of his key.
Here's the dilemma of when you are locked out of someone's apartment. Do you wait outside to indicate to all passers by that the person you are waiting for is just an acquaintance and there would be no reason for you to have a key? Or, you do go inside the building with someone who lives there, and just wait in the lobby? I always felt the latter was more embarassing. I would see the same people every night getting home from work as I just sat on a concrete planter in the lobby waiting for O to walk through the door. I always felt the need to explain myself to these people as they walked passed me to get their mail. "I'm not locked out" "I'm not a prostitute, I swear!" Those were the looks I was getting. I was imagining the conversation when they got back in their apartments. "Bert, that young lady is sitting out there again! Maybe we should call the Super".
O and I had 5 seperate conversations about me obtaining a copy of his key. They always ended with me saying, "why can't you understand, it's not just about the key!" He really felt that it was not neccessary for me to have a copy. At times when he knew that I had the most logical reasoning for wanting it, he would shut me up by saying, "fine, I'll try to find the time to make you a copy!"
Just when I had given up my battle of getting a key from him, we were watching tv at his apartment, and he asked if I wanted to come back over the next night. I of course said yes, but was very suspicious of what was going on. O is not the type to make future plans in any way what so ever, even one day ahead. He then said, cue the angels singing, "here, i'll give you a copy of the key for downstairs and the bottom lock for the apartment door." I played it real cool. "oh, ok". I then excused myself to the bathroom, and grabbed my phone. I texted every friend I had ever cried to about not getting a key from him. I fell to my knees and thanked God for whatever change had come over him. I felt like I finally won. Our relationship was finally coming up to speed like normal people.
About 2 weeks later, O was working on a Saturday and I said I would meet him at his place when he was done. Logically we should have just went to my place, but I really wanted to try out the new key! I left my house extra early, just so I could sit on his couch and bask in my glory at having won this long fought battle. On the way he called. Here's how the conversation went.
O- when are you leaving?
Me- Im already on my way
O-How are you going to get inside?
Me- (smiling) with the keys you gave me
O- I only gave you the downstairs key and the key to bottom lock upstairs
Me- (not smiling) I don't understand, how did I get inside last time?
O- I left the top lock unlocked
complete silence
O- hello? hello?
Me- (steam coming out of my ears, tears in my eyes) You tricked me
O- you tricked yourself
Looking back on this insanity, I now realize I did trick myself. A key should never be a question, if it's not a question for you. Sometimes we see what we just want to see.
